Today accidently I saw my collague view porn on his pc.
WTF, i thought. Office hours, and his work is not finished yet also!
Began mad, I thought that as long as ur job finished, you can do anything you want!
But still.. Porn? Damn u can do at home what??!
Then.. somehow some whisper in my ear..
“Ur job also not finished yet, then why u always watch that kind of movie”
Yeah then I refer to my self.
Huahahahhaahahaaaa… I did exactly the same.
Lot of God’s work, my Lord, my Boss..
Then I never finished, but I always watch that kind of “entertainment” without realize until that moment.
What a shame.. (‘_’)
I’m sorry Lord..
Many good places..
Hey but I’m lonely..
I want an accompany..
Definitely need a partner..
Among the wars, the deadly wars…
We don’t know about 2 minutes, 2 morrow, are we still alive or not.
That’s why we won’t really think about the “unimportant things”.
There’s won’t be running for a “great” or “black or white” or “woman or man” and so on.
Then all will be about “SAVE ONE MORE SOUL”
That’s the important thing.
It won’t be about clothes, either about the appearance.
“LIFE” is the thing that does matter.
We are at the deadly war now!
Yup. Me either. Just can feel.
Save one more soul. For Him.
It’s about Him.
Let the eternal things become priority.
Greatest pain that Lord God Christ had done was the cross.
He can chose not to take the cross. He is the Lord. He can do anything. But He deny Himself and took the cross way for us.
Then He also prayed to the father to take away His pain, if possible.
But let the Father will be done, not Himself.
This greatest pain also I am experiencing right now.
And I cry to the Lord to take out my pain if its possible.
Then Lord still want me to go this way.
Then I have no choice unless go this way.
Very hard for me to do it 😦
And I want to just quit.
Cos I know I can choose another way and to not do this.
But once again I need to do this.
Then I choose to go this way!!!
Guess what, I choose to go this way.
Put my pride down to earth.
Act that I fine. Pretending that I’m allright.
Jesus. My Lord.
You know me more than myself.
Then I know you know about my feeling now.
Is there any possibility to skip this step???
Its not my will, but Your will.
Just hold my hand. Be with me in my darkest hours.
And I’ll be fine.
Thanks for reading this bulky things inside my mind.
And after the angriness with the world, I angry also with my God.. 😦
Just know that He let it happen.. Then, how can I stop it when He want it to be?
AFRAID OF LOT OF THINGS IN THIS SPOT OF LITTLE LIFE
Damn I lost my self, and I have to trust in Him.
Just can trust Him, no choice.
Instead of quit.
No easier way.
God.. Do I have to suffer this way???
Please excuse my horrible English 😀
When you read my blog, u’ll find a great amount of grammatical errors and modificated vocab. Hahahahaaaaaaaaa..
Then also I couldn’t write a nice sentence, not even a long article as the expert writers or bloggers.
I’ll always do improvement! 😀
Hope u can still enjoy and understand what I’m talking about. Haha.
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